Victim of Changes
My body is changing, and it doesn't feel like it's mine. Surgery. Medication side effects. Fatigue. Pain. It's all taken it's toll. In the approximately 8 years that I've been chronically ill, my body has been constantly changing in front of my own eyes. I've pretty much doubled my weight in that time, as I've slowly become less active, been too tired to cook so relied on take aways or easy to prepare junk food, been too nauseous to eat, battled my eating disorder, forced myself to exercise as recommended by healthcare before the inevitable crash. I had to actively stop thinking about my weight and focused on resting since August, but as I recently put on a pair of jeans to brave the outside world, I noticed they were tight and became all too aware of it once again. There's a battle with societal expectations, fatphobia, mental and physical health, energy, comfort, and so much more, but at the end of it all lies my body. Broken and bloated and unrecognis...
